What is Shadow Work? 3 Prompts to Get You Started
We all have shadows.
In the 1950s, the Swiss psychiatrist and psychotherapist Carl Jung began exploring the concept of the Shadow, describing it as the “dark side” of our personality hidden in our unconscious mind; it is the part which contains all the things we’d rather not acknowledge are present or real. This Shadow might include our repressed memories, childhood traumas, or even simply the inner narratives we prefer not to engage with.
When people ask me what shadows are, I describe them in this way:
Shadows are the parts of us we'd prefer to not admit are real and when they’re seen or questioned, or even hinted at, we can feel uncomfortable, defensive, and disgruntled. We can feel as though we are under direct attack.
(Note: some psychologists and practitioners refer to The Shadow as a singular part of us; others, including myself, use the plural to describe different shadows we hold.)
And yet – when we learn to recognize them and sit with them, we can touch upon a depth of experience that brings more meaning and purpose to our lives and more stability and spaciousness to our mental health.
Consider this scenario: a white person feels defensive during a discussion about race and white supremacy within their friend group. Upon reflection, they later realize that their discomfort stems from a fear of confronting their own biases or acknowledging systemic racism. This realization highlights the presence of both personal and communal shadows, indicating areas for growth and exploration.
This is the goal of shadow work.
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Shadow work is a process of increasing our capacity to be aware of and in connection with our shadows, not to destroy them, but to hold them in gentleness and care. Andrea Owen writes that it is “about finding the courage to acknowledge and integrate these parts, so we can live more fully and authentically."
And incorporating shadow work into your daily life doesn't have to be daunting.
Start by setting aside a few minutes each day for self-reflection. You can journal about any moments where you felt defensive, exploring the underlying beliefs or narratives at play. By consistently engaging in this practice, you'll gradually increase your awareness of personal shadows and pave the way for deeper healing.
But here’s the plot twist – we don’t only have personal shadows.
Instead, we have shadows at three different levels: personal, communal, and societal. This means that for deep healing to occur, which is always about more than just ourselves, shadow work has to be done in all three of these levels.
If shadow work isn’t done, we will largely continue to perpetuate the status quo, being carried along the waves of our lives and never sinking beneath the surface. Some may describe this experience as operating on autopilot or becoming numb to everything around and within us.
Lama Rod Owens writes:
“The thing about our pain and our suffering is that until it is met and seen for what it is, it doesn't go anywhere. It’s like the dark places in your refrigerator, things hidden in little containers that you refuse to open because you don't quite remember when it got there. So instead of opening and facing the smelly containers you find, you ignore them and eventually run into an infestation, an overgrowth of mold and spores and bacteria and things that can kill you, because you didn't want to deal with them when they were just plain stinky.
And Richard Rohr, the renowned author on contemplative spirituality, writes, "We need to consciously acknowledge the shadow, especially in ourselves, and work to integrate it, or we will be at its mercy."
Below is a summary of the three types of shadows and how to begin shadow work for each.
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Personal Shadow Work
I'm not good enough. I'm not lovable. I'm not in control.
These are examples of personal shadows – the stories we tell ourselves about ourselves. Personal shadows include our fears, insecurities, worries, and negative inner narratives – the parts of ourselves we'd prefer to ignore and leave unseen (by ourselves and others.)
Imagine shadow work as shining a light into the darkest corners of one’s psyche. While it may initially reveal unsettling truths, it ultimately empowers you to reclaim those hidden aspects of yourself. Much like cleaning out a cluttered closet, confronting our shadows allows us to create space for growth and transformation.
My book Unmasking the Inner Critic: Lessons for Living an Unconstricted Life is written to support folks in doing their shadow work with these parts of themselves.
Personal Shadow Work Prompt:
One easy way to notice where your personal shadows are is to look for when you become defensive. Often, our defensiveness is our body's way of telling us a shadow is close to being revealed.
Over the course of the next day, keep a running note in your phone for when you feel defensive. Ask yourself: What narrative or belief within me is feeling under attack right now? Simply practice becoming more aware of when a personal shadow is present.
Communal Shadow Work
Shadows aren't only personal. They exist within our communities as the conversations we're uncomfortable having – especially those of us who hold power and rank within our communities.
Have we addressed the harm that member caused? When do we need to talk with him about his alcohol use? Why is attendance declining? How are we perpetuating White Supremacy and ableism in this program?
These are unnamed experiences, unspoken beliefs, and parts of our communities that, if named, would raise uncomfortable questions or challenge the prevailing narrative of the community.
Communal Shadow Work Prompt:
Think about your own communities:
Family
Friends
Work places
Faith communities
Volunteer organizations
In each of those communities, what topics get danced around? What past harms, ongoing injustices, and/or systemic issues would, if named, threaten the status quo?
Societal Shadow Work
Meritocracy. White Supremacy. Consumerism. Policing policy. Ableism.
These are sometimes the easiest shadows to identify and the hardest to address.
Societal shadows are the parts of our society that the dominant culture or group with power would prefer remain unexamined and unseen. A shortcut to identifying them: take a look at the news. What issues being named are causing mass unrest or mass defensiveness? Those are likely societal shadows.
They often exist like a smokey fog in our bodies, communities, and broader society. Some are unable to see their presence, some are actively dying because of them.
The first step of societal shadow work is to become aware of their presence in all aspects of life.
Societal Shadow Work Prompt:
A couple questions that might help reveal societal shadows around and within you:
Where is harm being caused in society?
What topics bring massive resistance with them when addressed?
Which structures have been deemed untouchable or "too big to fail?"
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